Civil War

In the spring during the last nine weeks of school, I like to teach a unit on the Civil War.   I really enjoy learning about the Civil War.  I've been to Gettysburg several times. It is really an amazing battlefield to walk. Being in a place where so much history took place and so many men died is humbling. One of the most memorable experiences is taking the two hour battlefield tour on horseback.  Riding the horse and listening to the details of what happened in the area that you're riding really puts you back in time. It's both a solemn and exciting experience.

When I was in eighth grade our class took a field trip there.  When we got to Pickett's Charge (a section of the battlefield that is basically an open field where the Confederates were slaughtered running toward the waiting Union army who were hunkered down behind a stone wall with cannons and rifles).  Our teachers lined us up and told us to run up to the wall.   We were all young, in jeans, t-shirts and tennis shoes and by the time we made it to the wall, we were hot, tired and sweating. Image running that with a flannel uniform on, carrying a pack and rifle during hot and muggy July.

The whole battlefield is impressive but Pickett's charge stands out because of how clearly it shows the thinking of the Southern military mindset verses the Union preparedness.  The thinking of  General Lee was still in the 'old ways' of battle.  One of the tour guides once explained that while weaponry was becoming more sophisticated and precise, the structure of how to battle was still in the antiquated thinking of the old military schools were the two armies would line up face to face.  Guerrilla warfare was not yet the standard way of thinking.  So, when Pickett decided to command his army to run that fatal charge, they were basically running toward their death. The Union soldiers were just firing at the men running toward them. The field was red with blood because the thinking of the Southern generals had not caught up with the modern weaponry.

Of course, this scenario made me think about people with addictions and living with them (pretty much everything I think of now, I end up finding a link of some kind on how to view or handle my situation). I realized I have been a commander in my own Civil War.  I was the Confederates-lining up my thinking in uniform rows expecting the same routine thinking from 'the other side'.  My daughter's addiction was the Union army with new thinking and 'weapon' usage.  Each time she would drink, I would fall back to the only thinking I knew; thinking that was logical and rational from the point of view of being sober.  Her thinking had changed as did her viewpoint.  Being on different 'battlefields' (thinking fields?) is what caused us both more stress and faltered progress than the drinking, I think.  The addiction is bad, don't get me wrong, but not being able to change your thinking to meet it head on and more appropriately did a lot of damage. Not only in relationships, but in memories and reactions. 

I do think I am almost caught up to speed.  I still falter but sometimes learning a new strategy takes time and practice.  I'm not running fully exposed, hot and unprepared toward a hidden enemy anymore.   I understand 'the enemy' a little better and have an updated book of strategies.  We have made progress and though the battle hasn't been won, yet, we have been able to call a truce.